3 am Thoughts — Thinking versus Feeling

Mari­lyn vos Savant, the per­son with the high­est IQ ever mea­sured, was once asked what the rela­tion­ship is between feel­ing and think­ing. Her response was that feel­ing is what you get for think­ing the way you do. In oth­er words, thought rules, not cir­cum­stance.

I’ve been think­ing about this state­ment a fair bit this week, and the more I think about it, the more pow­er­ful and empow­er­ing I find it to be. Very sim­i­lar to the “glass half full” ver­sus the “glass half emp­ty” anal­o­gy. It real­ly is a mat­ter of perception—how we inter­pret things dic­tates how we feel about them.

I raise this because it’s so rel­e­vant, not only with rela­tion­ships, but with life in gen­er­al. I kept ask­ing myself how many times have I let the way I per­ceive and think about things impact my feel­ings? In my per­son­al rela­tion­ship with some­one, every time I thought he would do things I don’t usu­al­ly allow myself to think, I would feel bad. Why? Because my thought process­es would auto­mat­i­cal­ly go on the over­drive. Then, I would be told that none of the sce­nar­ios I imag­ined hap­pened, or that I was wrong. But I still allowed my thought process­es affect my feel­ings. How many times did I get so upset at the “what could have beens”, and then I would make a con­scious effort to change my think­ing to appre­ci­ate the “what is” and my feel­ings as a result, would change, but only to back­slide again? I’m a recidi­vist.

I’m mak­ing a con­scious effort to only focus on what is with­in my sphere of con­trol and trust the rest to take care of itself because that is the only way I’d feel bet­ter and not dri­ve myself crazy.

I hope I don’t for­get this when I go nuts.

The Tell-Tale Heart

Lady in Red

What Holiday Spirit?

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