Dating the Unhinged: Online Dating Horror Stories


The Soul Mate

Last year, I broke up with my boyfriend of 7 years. When most peo­ple break up, it’s either they’ve fall­en out of love or some­one cheat­ed. It wasn’t the case for us — we were still in love when we decid­ed to call it quits. After the break up, I became a her­mit who occa­sion­al­ly bathed, turned off Face­book, glared at any­one who looked at me, quit my free­lanc­ing jobs, and had an inti­mate rela­tion­ship with 3 men — Jack, John­nie and Jose.

That vicious cycle con­tin­ued for 3 months. On Thanks­giv­ing 2016, I bumped my head and declared “I’ve had enough of this!” I quit drink­ing, acti­vat­ed my Face­book, and rejoined human­i­ty by get­ting reac­quaint­ed with the show­er. I decid­ed to try online dat­ing. I’ve talked to a lot! Most of them, but not all, think Fil­ip­inas are 1) scam­mers 2) une­d­u­cat­ed liars/cheats 3) scam­mers wait, I said that already. Some want­ed to give me mon­ey for naked pics (ho-hum), and one want­ed to give me camels and jew­el­ry (yes, this real­ly hap­pened). I’m just going to write about the guys who stood out for their noto­ri­ety.


Let’s call him Bruce. He was from the US but of Mid­dle East­ern lin­eage. A dead ringer for the Sixth Sense actor, he was a suave com­put­er engi­neer,  empath­ic, and charm­ing. Though the time zones suck, every­thing was well and good. We would talk on his way to work, dur­ing week­ends or when he was in the office.


I noticed he was very jeal­ous. We would talk about ran­dom stuff. When the flow of the con­ver­sa­tion went to any­thing about men, he would react neg­a­tive­ly (wagas kung maka react!) One time, we were talk­ing about celebri­ty crush­es. I point­ed out that he looked like Bruce Willis. Sud­den­ly, he was up in arms, going about if would I do Bruce Willis or if I meet any­one who looked like him. Huh? A lit­tle jeal­ousy is okay, but that was a tad over the top. The words psy­cho and Nor­man Bates flashed in my mind. It’s not just that. I hate liars, and I caught him lying. Lie to me and we are just done, no ifs, no buts. Our “rela­tion­ship” last­ed for a month. He was a Scor­pio. K bye Brucezil­la!

Douche from Down Under

I met him on a dif­fer­ent dat­ing site.  He loved my smile. He was from a coun­try near mine. We loved the same things — trav­el­ing, golf, pho­tog­ra­phy, and Cold­play. The weird thing though, I wasn’t even phys­i­cal­ly attract­ed to him at first. He sort of grew on me, like can­cer.

I noticed he had a lot of issues. I would say some­thing and he would mis­in­ter­pret it. At some point, I thought I was speak­ing in tongues. “Is some­thing wrong with me, is my Eng­lish that bad?” I asked myself. We talked about it but still, I felt like I was walk­ing on eggshells. He would whine a lot, about how stu­pid every­one was around him. It was like they exist­ed to annoy him. His rela­tion­ships end because there was always some­thing wrong with the women he was with. My gut was scream­ing red flags, but I was all for giv­ing peo­ple chances. We used to day­dream about future trav­els, our life togeth­er. Yeah, we devel­oped feel­ings. After talk­ing online for 5 months, we decid­ed to fly to anoth­er coun­try to meet. The ratio­nale behind this was for my pass­port to get stamped, in prepa­ra­tion my get­ting a visa for my trav­el to his home coun­try.


I was excit­ed, for this was my first trip abroad, and scared, because I didn’t know what to expect. I’d like to think we were hap­py, until the 4th day. We had a pet­ty argu­ment about some­thing, and I spoke my mind. All of a sud­den he wasn’t into me. I’ll spare you all the gory details, but I was left to fend for myself, in a coun­try where I don’t speak the lan­guage. I real­ly didn’t know what hap­pened. All I could sur­mise was his alter, who had a men­tal age of 6, took over. So girls, always have a plan B to Z. He was also a Scor­pio. I thought us Vir­gos are unhinged, but Scor­pios take the cake! If you are read­ing this, I stand by what I said before I left — you were a colos­sal waste of time.

3 am Thoughts — Immortal Beloved

The Naked Face


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